#028: Did You Just Gaslight Me? With Shannon Higgins, M.A., LPC-S - a podcast by Angie S

Have you been told you’re insecure, crazy and jealous,and started to doubt your own reality and sanity? Did they insult you and follow it up with “it’s only a joke, you’re too sensitive!“? Well then you’ll want to listen to this.

Shannon Higgins, a Licensed Professional Counselor is herself a survivor to thriver of narcissistic abuse from her ex-husband, this took place well after she specialized in her field of abuse. This can truly happen to anyone.

*Content note: this episode discusses abusive relationships, discretion is advised, if you experience any unease from this, please contact a local mental health helpline or a Trauma Trained Therapist*

We go over:

// What is a narcissist? There’s a spectrum, including the healthy kind.

// What is gaslighting?

// I read your submission of real life gaslighting stories both at the beginning & at the end of the episode.

// You don’t have to have had a toxic childhood to be a target of gaslighting.

// Not all gaslighters are narcissists, they can simply be toxic people but not actual narcissists.

// Is gaslighting always intentional, even when parents do it?

// How & why people become gaslighters.

// How to deal with a gaslighting parent.

// Complex PTSD.

// Why we think it’s our fault when we’re being gaslighted.

// The signs that you’re being gaslighted.

// The Human Magnet & Trauma Bonding Syndromes.

// Why gaslighters thrive on targeting successful people.

// Abuse amnesia and cognitive dissonance.

// The importance of not throwing the label out ‘just because’ someone doesn’t cater to our every whim or just isn’t a very good communicator as it invalidates those who really go through such a destructive ordeal of being emotionally abused and vilifies those who simply lack a skill but aren’t malicious.

// The difference between pushing back because we are secure versus gaslighting.

// Why some find it harder to ask and express what they need which in turns enables a toxic relationship.

// What specialist therapies Shannon recommends if you suffered from an abusive relationship (be it intimate or from a parent).

// It doesn’t always look like a big deal (but it is!) & why the outside world does not understand your situation and often blame the victim to be the instigator.

For current therapies, you can look up a Trauma Trained Therapist that uses one or a combo of these therapies:

// Brain Spotting is phenomenal and has long term benefits.

// Sensorimotor Psychotherapy.

// Somatic Experiencing Therapy.

// EMDR.

// Brainspotting.

Shannon’s recommended resources:
// "Psychopath Free: Recovering from Emotionally Abusive Relationships with Narcissists, Sociopaths and Other Toxic People" & "Whole Again" Jackson MacKenzie.

// “Why Does He Do That?” Lundy Bancroft.

// "Healing from Hidden Abuse: A Journey Through the Stages of Recovery from Psychological Abuse" Shannon Thomas, LCSW.

// "The Empath's Survival Guide" Judith Orloff, M.D.

// "In Sheep's Clothing: Understanding and Dealing with Manipulative People" George K. Simon, Ph.D.

// "Shadow Daughter: A Memoir of Estrangement" Harriet Brown (about a daughter with a mom who has a personality disorder).

// "Women Who Love Psychopaths: Inside the Relationships of Inevitable Harm with Psychopaths, Sociopaths & Narcissists" Sandra Brown, M.A.

// "The Covert Passive Aggressive Narcissist: Recognizing the Traits and Finding Healing After Hidden, Emotional and Psychological Abuse" Debbie Mirza.

// "Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving" Pete Walker, M.A.

// choosecourage.org

Find Shannon at

Further episodes of Too Old For This Sh*t

Further podcasts by Angie S

Website of Angie S