316. Regret is Shame Disguised As Maturity - a podcast by Emily Gough
from 2022-06-09T06:22:08
The feeling of regret can weigh us down for life. People often spend a lifetime wishing they could turn back time and make a different decision about something in the past. But I came across a quote recently about regret and it hit me like a freight train:
“When we are living authentically, there is no regret. Regret is just shame disguised as maturity. Don’t apologize for lessons learned or look down on past behaviours. Of course you don’t do the same things anymore. You’re evolving. You were exactly who you were supposed to be then just as you are now.” (-Thee Moe Ari).
Oof. The ‘shame disguised as maturity’ part got me. Regret fools us into thinking we “learned from our mistakes.” But learning is only theory…unless you do something with that knowledge. I made a choice at a young age to live totally free of regret. To me, there’s only reflection - looking back and learning from the challenging times or decisions we made that didn’t turn out. Reflecting on things that happened - emotional as they may be - is where growth happens. If you feel like you struggle with regret, I’m about to totally change your perspective.
In this episode, we’re talking about:
- Why people feel regret
- How to stop regretting things and reflect instead
- Why we should never avoid digging into our past
- What to do when strong emotions come up during reflection
- How to create space for emotions to flow properly
- Why it’s important to try and see the best in everyone, especially yourself
Have a listen and let me know what you think - even if you disagree on regret vs. reflection.
REFERENCES:
Thee Moe Ari on Instagram @loveoutproud
“Regret is just shame disguised as maturity” quote: https://www.instagram.com/p/Cde5IrwDeZ1/?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y=
Episode 291 | “Confident Detachment & Radical Honesty In Relationships With Dr. Jade Teta”
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